Friday, November 5th, 2004
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9:18 am
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STRANGER! if you, passing, meet me, and desire to speak to me, why should you not speak to me? And why should I not speak to you?
[to you - walt whitman]
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(5 smthgs | comment hier)
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Thursday, October 21st, 2004
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10:58 pm - Empty Bottles
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line up all the empty bottles
the long-necked beer bottles from the antique stores
the wine bottles and pop bottles left on beaches
steam off the labels and line the bottles up, the green ones with
the brown black yellow and clear ones
line up the beer bottles whose labels have been torn off by neurotic fingers
and the bottles sent back by the breweries because they have cockroaches or dead mice at the bottom
line up the bottles afloat on all the seas, those with messages in them and those without any
and the bottles with methyl hydrate-soaked cotton in them used by schoolkids for killing insects
line up the bottle that killed Malcolm Lowry with the bottle that killed Dylan Thomas and the bottles that killed all the drunken poets nobody's heard of and the poets who spoke all their lines into their bottles
and all of Purdy's crocuses that weren't smashed on frozen roadsides when thrown from car windows
line up the bottles of dark glass we look through darkly when we want to see the ghosts of our former selves
and the bottles Dr. Jekyll drank from, and all the Dr. Jekylls whether on the stage, in movies or on television
and the bottles of rubbing alcohol and aftershave and nail polish remover people only drink from in dark alleys
line up the embalming fluid bottles someone was saving to build a glass house some day
and the bottles of nerve gas saved up for the war nobody wants
and the bottles of toxic gas cruising the streets disguised as trucks
and the pill bottles, the billions of pill bottles emptied each year, and billions that sit half-empty for years on medicine shelves
line up the empty bottles sent back by hospitals for refills
line up all the empty bottles
the party's over
current mood: lazy
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(2 smthgs | comment hier)
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Sunday, May 30th, 2004
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7:16 pm
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Sunday, February 29th, 2004
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2:26 am - my journal is friends only now
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Friday, February 20th, 2004
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7:34 pm - Faithless.. im scared
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Jackie left on a cold, dark night Telling me he'd be home Sailed the seas for a hundred years And left me all alone
Now I've been dead for twenty years I've been washing the sand with my ghostly tears Searching the shores for my Jackie-oh
And I remember the day that the young man came Said, your Jackie's gone, he is lost in the rain And I ran to the beach And laid me down
You're all wrong, I said And they stared to the sand That man knows the sea like the back of his hand He'll be back some time Laughing at you
And I've been waiting all this time For my man to come, take his hand in mine And lead me away To unseen shores
I've been washing the sand with my salty tears Searching the shore these long years And I'll walk the sea forever more 'til I find my Jackie-oh
current mood: waiting
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(comment hier)
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3:27 pm - 90's subculture
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Wednesday, February 18th, 2004
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1:45 pm - Feels lot like suicide
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 You are a Cowgirl.
Which Stereotypical Pin-up Girl are you? brought to you by Quizilla
nah.. i dont agree w this test.. :/
nway, how cute huh, i was given a poem this week.. yay! it's from a classmate, she's somehow adorable.. :) one of the few girls in that stupid class that i like... ;) when i received her email with the poem oh well it was a big big big surprise..
she said that she wrote it cos she got inspired when visited my fotolog.. ;) oh man it feels so good to get someone inspired !! ;)
Here it is the poem:
Oh dear, oh dear...
long time don´t see ya... how´s life? is still boring I suppose... oh dear, oh dear... have I ever told you that I miss you? oh dear... what have you done to you hair? it looks good though... have I ever called you beautifull? many times I believe... once more... it won´t kill me... beautifull... oh dear, oh dear... did I tell you I´m still studying? NO? Why did I not tell you this? I must have forgotten... I´m really sorry, dear, but i must leave now.
simple yet it made me smile for hours ;)
current mood: just .. awake
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(2 smthgs | comment hier)
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Tuesday, February 17th, 2004
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11:22 pm - Nicole.. nicole...
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Don't go see Cold Mountain 'cos it is going to be a big big waste of time (and $$$$)!! The whole thing may be interesting but the love story within it is too predictable and somewhat silly... bleh
the only things i liked about Cold Mountain were
+ Jack White + + +
+ Nicole Kidman naked + +
+ The American Civil War +
current mood: good
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(2 smthgs | comment hier)
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Sunday, February 15th, 2004
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5:53 pm - (...) boring for someone so interesting
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[Body modification]
I miss Rita! Strange little girl "Where have you been?" (...) where are you??
man i love alanis sooooo much she's like the greatest woman that could ever ever ever ever exist.. can't tell how much i love her.. just love her... oh god, she's amazing... how come someone like her be real..!!??
Her voice Her lyrics They way she plays the guitar Her voice Her voice...
..*speechless*
I don't know where to begin in all my 50 odd years. I have been silently suffering and adapting, perpetuating, and enduring. Who are you younger generation to tell me that I have unresolved problems? Not many examples of fruits of this type of excruciating labor.
How can you just throw words around like grieve and heal and mourn? I feel fine, we may not have been born as awake as you were. It was much harder in those days, we had paper routes uphill both ways. We went from school to a job to wife to instant parenthood.
I walked into his office, I felt so self-conscious on the couch. He was sitting down across from me, he was writing down his hypothesis. I don't know. I've got a loving supportive wife who doesn't know how involved she should get. You say his interjecting was him just calling me on my shit?
wish i could have just one minute alone with her... i would do nothing but stand there just looking at her.. silently contemplating all that strange perfection.. :)
[So here we both are battling similar demons (not coincidentally)]
current mood: melancholy
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(comment hier)
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Saturday, February 14th, 2004
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5:51 pm - L.O.V.E.C.A.T.S
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Thursday, February 12th, 2004
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4:04 pm - Loved this test.. that´s me!
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| I am the Dandy Most of us feel trapped within the limited roles that the world expects us to play. We are instantly attracted to those who are more fluid that we are - those who create their own persona. Dandies excite us because they cannot be categorized, and hint at a freedom we want for ourselves. They play with masculinity and femininity; they fashion their own physical image, which is always startling. Use the power of the Dandy to create an ambiguous, alluring presence that stirs repressed desires. Symbol: The Orchid. Its shape and colour oddly suggest both sexes, its odour is sweet and decadent - it is a tropical flower of evil. Delicate and highly cultivated, it is prized for its rarity; it is unlike any other flower. | What Type of Seducer are You? created by polite_society </p>
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(comment hier)
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3:44 pm - I wish my headaches were gone.. forever
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Okay..
Tomorrow there´s this party i can´t miss.. and im not feeling totally fine.
SHIT!
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(comment hier)
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Wednesday, February 11th, 2004
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12:19 pm
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12:17 pm
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12:04 pm
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Tuesday, February 10th, 2004
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9:49 am - + +
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Monday, February 9th, 2004
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2:57 pm
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1:34 am - you don't need a space ship
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It is so silent around here at night.. makes me feel so lonely and so strangely happy..
There's this cold wind blowing through my window, invading my bedroom, impregnating the air..
[moments]
A bottle of coke, Tori's singing on the radio, internet chats with friends.. i'm just loving tonight.
Sometimes i feel as if all my problems were definitely gone, no worries at all left for tomorrow morning, only bliss and calmness.. nothing could really irritate me now, negativity simply can't reach me on moments like this...
my real problems are locked inside their rooms, sleeping their restless sleeps, dreaming their tormented dreams... leaving me here alone to all this blessing.. it is so incredibly calm when they are not around..
Okay, no more rants now, u've had enough i guess.. let me show you some great shots from this morning..
[It is so fuckin' perfect to wake up to a morning like this]

hunnie babie.. love you so much ("it doesn't fit!!")

my Lu and Carol

me + carolzinha :o**

again.. ;) [in love with my new hairdo]

:) the emptiness of youth

again.. ;)

own... *squeez* Rapha and me

the echo that is love

playing head over feet
current mood: contemplative
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(6 smthgs | comment hier)
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Friday, February 6th, 2004
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6:20 pm - Lost Highway
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MYSTERY MAN We've met before, haven't we?
FRED I don't think so. Where was it that you think we've met?
MYSTERY MAN At your house. Don't you remember?
FRED (surprised) No, no I don't. Are you sure?
MYSTERY MAN Of course. In fact, I'm there right now.
FRED (incredulous) What do you mean? You're where right now?
MYSTERY MAN At your house.
FRED That's absurd.
The Mystery Man reaches into his coat pocket, takes out a cellular phone and holds it out to Fred.
MYSTERY MAN Call me.
Fred snickers, like this is a bad joke. The Mystery Man puts the phone into Fred's hand.
MYSTERY MAN (CON-T) Dial your number.
Fred hesitates, puzzled.
MYSTERY MAN (CON-T) Go ahead.
Fred shrugs, laughs, dials his number. We HEAR a pick up as we stay on FRED'S FACE.
PHONE VOICE OF MYSTERY MAN I told you I was here.
Fred, still holding the phone, stares at the man standing in front of him.
FRED How did you do that?
The Mystery Man points to the phone.
MYSTERY MAN Ask me.
Fred, mirthful at first, as if it is a party trick of some kind, suddenly turns serious - it's obvious he's thinking now of the videotapes. He speaks into the phone.
FRED (angrily) How did you get into my house?
PHONE VOICE OF MYSTERY MAN You invited me. It's not my habit to go where I'm not wanted.
Fred looks at the man in front of him, but speaks again into the phone.
FRED Who are you?
The man laughs - identical laughs - both over the phone and in person.
current mood: indescribable
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(15 smthgs | comment hier)
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6:06 pm - Go!
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[CLAIRE]
I’m serious. My whole life seems to be this giant audition for the Real World. It’s like, my friends, everybody here, they’re always trying to front themselves as something they’re not. And then no matter what, they always get screwed in the end. It’s inevitable.
[GAINES]
Maybe so.
[CLAIRE]
I say, set your expectations low and be happy if anything remotely good happens. Gaines leaves money for the check. CLAIRE You know what I like best about Christmas? The surprises. It’s like, you get this box, and you’re sure you know what’s in it. You shake it, you weigh it, and you’re totally convinced you have it pegged. No doubt in your mind. But then you open it up, and it’s something completely different. Bing! Wow! Bang! Surprise! I mean, it’s like you and me here.
She takes a sip of coffee, smiles. She has a bewitching smile.
current mood: lethargic
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(comment hier)
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